More Medical Drama

Monday, April 23, 2007

Written by Kodi Wolf at 8:30 PM

Back in November, Corene's dad was diagnosed with cancer (Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma, Stage 4, Aggressive). He and Corene's mom decided to do chemo, even though he's like 80, diabetic, and couldn't even remember how to start his name when he was supposed to sign the consent forms. The chemo seemed to get his cancer under control, but it also basically wiped out his immune system, so of course he ended up with a staph infection from a pimple on his elbow. That was the beginning of March. At one point, they didn't know if they were going to have to amputate his arm because they thought it might have gone down to his bone, but they did finally get it under control after putting him in a medically-induced coma for two weeks.

Then they found out his cancer had returned. He's way too weak for more chemo, so the doctor basically sent him home to die, though the doc did set him up with "palliative" (pain management) care and worked out a deal with a hospice center for when the time came.

Corene's mom has been in total denial, trying herbal remedies that are supposed to boost his immune system and "cure" him, but he's basically stopped eating, which is never a good sign.

Today, Corene got the call that they had to take her dad back to the hospital because he's just too weak. They're moving him to hospice today. I think everything is happening faster than anybody thought it would.

On top of that, I seem to have hit the crying stage of my emotional recovery. My abandonment issues are in full swing. Corene has gone in late to work twice in the past two weeks because I was just a wreck. I calm down pretty quickly (an hour or two), but it's exhausting (I'm not sleeping much either, but that's nothing new) and I feel really bad about adding more stress to Corene's load, what with her father dying and everything. But she told me it's okay. She loves me and she'd rather I cry than hold it in. I know she's right, but I still feel shitty about the timing. As if there could ever be a "good time" to have a nervous breakdown... Well, it's not that bad, but it still sucks.